The Psychology of Procrastination: Why We Put Things Off
“Procrastination isn’t laziness—it’s avoidance. It’s the mind’s way of dodging discomfort, failure, or even success. In this episode, we go deep into the emotional roots of procrastination, unpacking what’s really behind the delay, and how to stop judging yourself long enough to actually get things done.”
Transcript
Episode Title: Psychology of Procrastination: Why We Put Things Off, February 13, 2025
Today, we’re exploring something that I think all of us have experienced at some point: procrastination. You know the feeling—it’s that moment when you look at a task you need to tackle, and instead of diving in, you suddenly find yourself scrolling through social media, cleaning out a junk drawer, or doing literally anything else. It’s such a universal experience that I’d bet you’ve already thought of something you’re procrastinating on right now.
Let me tell you a quick story to start us off. When I was working on my very first book, I remember sitting at my desk, staring at a blank page, thinking, “I’ve got plenty of time.” The deadline was months away, and I told myself that I’d start tomorrow. But then tomorrow turned into next week, and next week turned into next month. Before I knew it, that far-off deadline was suddenly breathing down my neck. I spent those final weeks scrambling, staying up late, and pushing myself to the limit. And I couldn’t help but ask myself, “Why did I wait so long?”
And maybe you’ve had a similar moment—whether it was cramming for an exam, finishing a work project, or even something simple like returning a phone call or scheduling a doctor’s appointment. Procrastination doesn’t discriminate. It can sneak into any corner of our lives.
Here’s the thing: procrastination isn’t about being lazy or careless. In fact, many of the most ambitious, hardworking people I know struggle with it. And that’s because procrastination is less about the tasks we’re avoiding and more about the emotions we’re trying to manage. It’s a deeply human experience, tied to how we process discomfort, fear, and even self-doubt.
In this episode, we’re going to break it all down. We’ll explore the psychology of procrastination, the neuroscience behind why it happens, and the emotional patterns that keep us stuck. We’ll also look at practical, science-backed strategies to help you shift your habits and approach those tasks with a fresh perspective.
But I want to make one thing clear: this isn’t about perfection. It’s about understanding ourselves better. By the end of this episode, my hope is that you’ll feel equipped with tools to tackle procrastination, but also a little more compassion for yourself when it shows up—because, let’s be honest, it will.
So, if you’re ready, let’s dive into the science of procrastination. Why we put things off, what it’s really about, and how we can move forward with clarity and confidence.
First Section: Defining Procrastination
Procrastination. It’s a word that’s almost become synonymous with guilt and frustration. But let’s pause for a moment and really think about what it means. Procrastination isn’t just about putting something off until later; it’s a complex interplay of emotions, decisions, and, sometimes, avoidance. It’s not a sign of laziness or a lack of willpower—though it often feels that way. At its core, procrastination is an emotional regulation problem.
Psychologists define procrastination as the voluntary delay of an intended course of action, despite expecting to be worse off for doing so. Let’s unpack that for a second. It’s not that you’re unaware of the consequences of delay—you probably know, deep down, that waiting until the last minute isn’t the best strategy. But in the moment, the discomfort associated with starting feels greater than the reward of completing the task.
One of the key theories that helps us understand procrastination is something called temporal discounting. This is the idea that we tend to prioritize short-term rewards over long-term benefits. Let’s say you have a report due next week. Sitting down to start it now might feel tedious or overwhelming, while binge-watching your favorite show feels immediately gratifying. Your brain naturally gravitates toward the option that brings instant pleasure, even though future-you will have to face the consequences.
This isn’t just about personality or habit—it’s about the way our brains are wired. Our amygdala, the part of the brain responsible for processing emotions, is like a smoke alarm that goes off when we perceive discomfort or fear. When faced with a daunting task, that alarm might signal avoidance as the safest route. Meanwhile, our prefrontal cortex, the area of the brain responsible for planning and decision-making, tries to step in and remind us of the long-term benefits of action. The result? A tug-of-war between the emotional and rational parts of your brain.
And this is where task aversion comes into play. Think about a time when you procrastinated on something—not because it was inherently difficult, but because it carried emotional weight. Maybe it was an uncomfortable conversation you needed to have, a project you weren’t confident about, or even a pile of paperwork that just felt mind-numbing. Procrastination often stems from negative emotions associated with the task—fear, boredom, self-doubt—and our instinct to avoid those feelings.
Let me give you a quick example. Years ago, I had a student, let’s call him Mark, who came to me in tears one day. He’d been avoiding his final thesis project for weeks, and now the deadline was looming. When we talked about what was holding him back, it wasn’t the work itself—Mark was brilliant and more than capable of writing an excellent paper. It was the fear of failure. He felt so much pressure to do well that he couldn’t bring himself to start. For Mark, procrastination wasn’t about laziness; it was about protecting himself from the possibility of falling short.
And here’s the thing: Mark’s story isn’t unique. Many of us procrastinate not because we don’t care, but because we care so much that starting feels overwhelming. The task becomes a mirror for our insecurities, and avoidance feels like the safest way to manage those emotions—at least in the moment.
Procrastination also has a sneaky way of reinforcing itself. You avoid a task because it feels uncomfortable, but that avoidance creates a ripple effect of guilt and stress. Now, not only do you have the original task to deal with, but you’re also carrying the emotional weight of having put it off. And that cycle can be incredibly hard to break.
So, let’s take a moment to reframe the way we think about procrastination. Instead of seeing it as a personal flaw, what if we looked at it as a signal? A message from your mind that something about the task is triggering discomfort, fear, or uncertainty. By understanding that message, we can begin to address the underlying emotions and break free from the procrastination loop.
Now that we’ve laid the foundation for what procrastination really is, let’s explore what’s happening in the brain when we put things off. Because when you understand the mechanics, you can start to make sense of the patterns—and, more importantly, find a way to change them.
The Neuroscience Behind Procrastination
Let’s talk about what’s happening in your brain when you procrastinate. Because, believe it or not, procrastination isn’t just a matter of willpower—it’s rooted in the way our brains are wired. And understanding these mechanisms can be a game-changer.
When you’re faced with a task, especially one that feels overwhelming or unpleasant, two major players in your brain spring into action: the amygdala and the prefrontal cortex. Think of them as two opposing forces. The amygdala is your brain’s emotional alarm system. It’s designed to detect threats—whether real or imagined—and trigger a response. When it perceives a task as stressful or daunting, it sends out a signal that basically says, “Avoid this! Danger ahead!”
On the other hand, you’ve got your prefrontal cortex, which is the rational, planning part of your brain. This is the area responsible for setting goals, weighing long-term consequences, and making decisions. It’s the part of your brain that reminds you that writing that paper or preparing for that presentation is ultimately in your best interest.
But here’s the kicker: the amygdala reacts faster than the prefrontal cortex. It’s wired for immediacy, which is great if you’re running from a bear, but not so helpful when you’re staring at a spreadsheet. The result is a kind of internal tug-of-war. Your amygdala screams, “Let’s avoid this!” while your prefrontal cortex calmly suggests, “But we really should get started.” And in many cases, the amygdala wins—especially when the task triggers strong negative emotions like fear, anxiety, or self-doubt.
This emotional tug-of-war ties into what’s known as the limbic system hijack. Essentially, your emotional brain overrides your logical brain. That’s why you might find yourself procrastinating even when you know it’s not a good idea. You’re not acting irrationally; you’re acting emotionally.
Let me share a fascinating study with you. Researchers at Stanford University, led by Samuel McClure, explored what happens in the brain when people choose between immediate and delayed rewards. They found that when people opted for an immediate reward, the emotional parts of their brain lit up, especially the limbic system. But when they made decisions focused on long-term rewards, the prefrontal cortex was more active. This shows how our brains are naturally inclined to prioritize short-term gratification over long-term goals, which is a key factor in procrastination.
Now, let’s add another layer: dopamine. You’ve probably heard of it as the brain’s “feel-good” chemical, but it’s really about motivation and reward. When you do something enjoyable—like checking social media or watching a favorite show—your brain releases dopamine, reinforcing the behavior. On the flip side, tasks that don’t promise immediate rewards, like filing taxes or studying, don’t trigger that same dopamine response. So, your brain gravitates toward the activity that feels good now, rather than the one that benefits you later.
This is where technology can make things even trickier. Social media platforms, streaming services, and video games are designed to exploit this dopamine system. They offer instant gratification at the exact moment you’re trying to muster the energy to tackle a task. The next thing you know, what started as a “quick break” has turned into an hour-long scroll through Instagram or a binge-watching session.
But here’s the good news: understanding these processes can help you outsmart them. The brain is malleable, and just as we can get stuck in a cycle of procrastination, we can train ourselves to break free from it. By recognizing the emotional triggers and rewiring our response to them, we can shift the balance of power from the amygdala to the prefrontal cortex.
So, the next time you find yourself avoiding a task, pause and ask yourself, “What is my brain trying to protect me from right now? Is it fear? Boredom? Anxiety?” By identifying the emotion behind the procrastination, you can begin to address it directly. And once you’ve done that, you’ll find it’s much easier to take that first step.
In the next section, we’ll take a closer look at why we procrastinate—not just from a neurological standpoint, but also from an emotional and psychological perspective. Because while the brain’s mechanics are fascinating, the real heart of the issue lies in how we process and respond to those deeper emotions. Let’s explore that together.
Why We Procrastinate: A Deeper Dive
Let’s move beyond the brain and talk about the emotions and psychology that drive procrastination. Because while understanding the neuroscience gives us valuable insight into what’s happening beneath the surface, the heart of procrastination lies in how we feel—and how we respond to those feelings.
One of the biggest reasons we procrastinate is fear. It might not be obvious at first, but procrastination is often a form of self-protection. Think about a task you’ve put off recently. Was it something tied to high expectations, where the stakes felt particularly high? Maybe it was a work project, an application, or even a creative endeavor. Procrastination can be our way of avoiding failure—or, sometimes, the fear of success.
Let me tell you about a student I worked with years ago. She was incredibly bright, the kind of person you just knew was going to do great things. But when it came time to work on her senior thesis, she froze. Week after week, she’d come to me with vague updates, promising she’d make progress soon. Finally, we had a heart-to-heart, and she admitted she was terrified of not living up to her own potential. She said, “If I don’t start, I can’t mess it up.” Her procrastination wasn’t about laziness—it was about protecting herself from the possibility of falling short.
This brings us to another big factor: perfectionism. The drive to do things perfectly can be so overwhelming that it prevents us from starting at all. Perfectionists often procrastinate not because they don’t care, but because they care too much. They’re so focused on the idea of producing something flawless that the fear of imperfection becomes paralyzing.
Then there’s overwhelm. Have you ever looked at a project so big, so complex, that you didn’t even know where to begin? That feeling of paralysis is a common trigger for procrastination. Psychologist Barry Schwartz talks about this in his work on the paradox of choice. When we have too many options—or when a task feels too large—it can leave us feeling stuck. Breaking it down into smaller, more manageable steps can make a huge difference, but in the moment, it’s easier to avoid the task altogether.
And let’s not forget the role of instant gratification. In today’s world, we’re surrounded by distractions that promise quick and easy rewards. Social media, streaming platforms, online shopping—they’re all designed to capture our attention and keep us engaged. These distractions feed into what psychologists call delay discounting, where the immediate reward of scrolling through TikTok feels more appealing than the distant benefit of finishing your work. It’s not your fault that these platforms are so tempting—they’re built to hijack your brain’s reward system.
But procrastination isn’t just about external factors. Sometimes, it’s tied to deeper, internal struggles. For example, low self-esteem can play a significant role. If you doubt your ability to succeed, you might avoid starting a task as a way to protect yourself from confirming those doubts. It’s a form of self-preservation, even if it doesn’t serve you in the long run.
I’ve also seen procrastination emerge from a sense of rebellion. This is especially common in teenagers and young adults, but it can show up at any age. When we feel pressured or controlled, putting something off can become a way of reclaiming autonomy. It’s not always conscious, but it’s a way of saying, “You can’t make me.”
What’s important to remember is that procrastination is rarely about the task itself. It’s about the emotions tied to that task—fear, uncertainty, frustration, boredom, or even resentment. When we avoid the task, we’re really avoiding the feelings it brings up.
So, how do we break free from this cycle? It starts with awareness. The next time you find yourself procrastinating, take a moment to pause and reflect. Ask yourself, “What am I feeling right now? What is this task bringing up for me?” Naming the emotion can be incredibly powerful. It takes some of the mystery out of procrastination and gives you a place to start.
In the next section, we’ll explore practical strategies for overcoming procrastination—science-backed techniques that can help you shift your mindset, manage your emotions, and take action, even when it feels difficult. Let’s turn those insights into real, meaningful change.
Breaking the Procrastination Cycle
Now that we’ve unpacked the psychology and emotions behind procrastination, let’s talk about how to move forward. Because understanding why we procrastinate is one thing, but breaking the cycle is another. The good news? There are practical, science-backed strategies that can help.
The first step is reframing the way you think about tasks. Often, we approach certain tasks with dread, telling ourselves they’re boring, overwhelming, or just plain unpleasant. But what if you changed the narrative? Instead of saying, “I have to do this,” try saying, “I get to do this.” It sounds simple, but this subtle shift in language can transform a sense of obligation into an opportunity. When I was writing my most recent book, I found myself procrastinating during the editing process—something I’ve never particularly enjoyed. But reframing it as a chance to refine my ideas and make them better helped me approach it with a more positive mindset.
Another powerful tool is time chunking, often referred to as the Pomodoro Technique. This involves setting a timer—usually for 25 minutes—and committing to focused work during that time. When the timer goes off, you take a short break, then repeat the cycle. What makes this technique effective is that it reduces the psychological resistance to starting. Instead of thinking about the entire task, you’re only committing to 25 minutes. And more often than not, once you’ve started, it’s easier to keep going.
Emotion management is another critical piece of the puzzle. As we’ve discussed, procrastination is often rooted in feelings like fear or anxiety. Addressing those emotions directly can make a big difference. For instance, if you’re procrastinating because you’re afraid of failing, remind yourself that progress matters more than perfection. One of my favorite quotes comes from author Anne Lamott, who says, “Almost all good writing begins with terrible first efforts.” This applies not just to writing, but to any creative or challenging task. Giving yourself permission to start imperfectly can help you push past that initial resistance.
Let’s also talk about rewards. Remember how we discussed the brain’s love for dopamine? You can use that to your advantage by creating small, immediate rewards for completing parts of a task. For example, if you’re writing a paper, you might reward yourself with a five-minute walk or a cup of tea after finishing a section. These little incentives tap into your brain’s natural reward system, making the process feel less daunting.
One strategy I’ve found particularly helpful is implementation intentions. This involves creating a specific plan for when, where, and how you’ll tackle a task. Instead of saying, “I’ll work on this later,” try something like, “I’ll write the introduction to my report at 10 a.m. in my office.” Research shows that people who set these kinds of concrete intentions are far more likely to follow through.
And let’s not forget the power of breaking tasks into smaller steps. When a project feels overwhelming, it’s easy to freeze. But if you break it down into bite-sized pieces, it becomes much more manageable. For instance, instead of telling yourself, “I need to clean the entire house,” focus on one room or even just one corner. Each small win builds momentum and makes the next step feel less intimidating.
Here’s a personal example. When I was in grad school, I had a professor who insisted we write our dissertations one sentence at a time. At first, it sounded ridiculous. But when I sat down and wrote that first sentence, something clicked. It didn’t feel overwhelming anymore—it felt possible. And that’s the magic of small steps: they remind you that progress is always within reach.
Of course, it’s also important to be kind to yourself. Procrastination is a deeply human experience, and beating yourself up over it only makes things worse. Self-compassion isn’t just a nice idea—it’s a proven tool for resilience. Research by Dr. Kristin Neff shows that people who practice self-compassion are better able to cope with setbacks and are more likely to stay motivated. So, the next time you find yourself procrastinating, try saying, “It’s okay. I’m human. I can start again right now.”
Breaking the procrastination cycle isn’t about becoming perfect—it’s about becoming intentional. By understanding your emotions, using practical strategies, and treating yourself with kindness, you can create a healthier, more productive relationship with your tasks.
In our final section, we’ll explore the importance of self-compassion and why treating yourself with understanding is one of the most powerful tools for overcoming procrastination. Let’s keep going.
Why Compassion Is Key
Let’s take a moment to talk about something that often gets overlooked in the conversation about procrastination: compassion. Not for the people you might feel you’re letting down, but for yourself. Because if there’s one thing I’ve learned—both from research and from personal experience—it’s that self-compassion is essential for breaking the cycle of procrastination.
When you procrastinate, it’s easy to fall into a spiral of guilt and self-criticism. You might catch yourself thinking, “Why can’t I just get it together?” or “I’m so lazy.” But here’s the thing: that inner dialogue doesn’t motivate change—it keeps you stuck. When you’re harsh with yourself, you trigger your brain’s stress response, making it even harder to take action.
Dr. Kristin Neff, a leading researcher in the field of self-compassion, explains it beautifully. She says that self-compassion isn’t about letting yourself off the hook—it’s about treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you’d offer a good friend. When you approach procrastination with curiosity instead of judgment, you create space for growth and change.
Think about it this way. Imagine a close friend comes to you and says, “I’ve been procrastinating on this project, and I feel awful about it.” Would you tell them they’re lazy or incapable? Of course not. You’d probably say something like, “It’s okay. Everyone struggles with this sometimes. What’s really going on? How can I help?” Now imagine offering that same kindness to yourself.
This isn’t just about being nice—it’s about creating the emotional safety you need to move forward. When you approach procrastination with compassion, you’re more likely to identify the real reason behind it. Is it fear? Overwhelm? Uncertainty? Once you name the emotion, you can start addressing it in a constructive way.
I’ll share a personal story here. When I was in my early teaching career, I used to procrastinate on grading assignments. It wasn’t because I didn’t care—it was because I cared too much. I wanted to give every student thoughtful, detailed feedback, and the idea of doing it perfectly felt overwhelming. It wasn’t until I acknowledged that fear of imperfection that I could start to let it go. I told myself, “Your students need your feedback, not your perfection.” That shift in perspective made all the difference.
Research supports this idea. Studies show that people who practice self-compassion are more resilient and better able to bounce back from setbacks. They’re also less likely to procrastinate, because they’re not paralyzed by fear of failure. Self-compassion creates a foundation of trust and safety that allows you to take risks and try again, even when things don’t go perfectly.
So, what does self-compassion look like in practice? It starts with awareness. The next time you catch yourself procrastinating, pause and notice what you’re feeling. Instead of jumping to judgment, try saying, “This is hard right now. It’s okay to struggle. I’m doing the best I can.”
Another powerful practice is reframing mistakes as opportunities for growth. Instead of seeing procrastination as a failure, think of it as a chance to learn more about yourself. Ask, “What can this teach me? How can I use this experience to do things differently next time?”
And finally, remember that progress is more important than perfection. Every small step you take—whether it’s five minutes of focused work or a single sentence written—is a victory. Celebrate those moments. They’re proof that you’re moving forward, even when it feels slow.
Procrastination is part of being human. It’s not a flaw or a failure—it’s a signal that something deeper is going on. By approaching it with curiosity, compassion, and a willingness to try, you can transform the way you relate to your tasks—and to yourself.
As we wrap up, I want to leave you with this thought: The next time you find yourself procrastinating, pause and take a breath. Ask yourself, “What do I need right now?” Sometimes, the answer will be rest. Sometimes, it will be courage. Whatever it is, give yourself permission to listen and respond with kindness. Because when you treat yourself with compassion, you’re not just breaking the cycle of procrastination—you’re building a stronger, healthier relationship with yourself.
Thank you for joining me today. I hope this conversation has given you some new insights and tools to work with. Until next time, take care of yourself and keep moving forward—one small step at a time.
Closing
Thank you for spending time with me today on The Psychology of Us. I hope this conversation about procrastination has offered you more than just strategies—I hope it’s given you a sense of understanding, both for the challenges we all face and for the ways we can grow through them.
Procrastination isn’t a moral failing; it’s a signal. A nudge from your mind that something deeper is at play. When we respond to that nudge with curiosity and compassion, we open the door to real change. Whether it’s breaking a task into smaller steps, reframing how you approach your work, or simply being kinder to yourself when things feel overwhelming, every small shift matters.
As you go about your week, I encourage you to try one thing we’ve discussed today. Maybe it’s practicing self-compassion when you notice you’re avoiding something. Maybe it’s setting a timer and committing to just 25 minutes of focused work. Whatever resonates with you, give it a try—and notice how it feels.
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